How to speak the language of learning?

Positive self-talk can greatly enhance learning.

It is not irrelevant how we engage in an internal dialogue with ourselves. Negative self-talk can have a detrimental impact on our self-esteem and wellbeing. When we observe our inner voice being unproductive, harmful or demeaning, we can choose to talk back at it. Coaching helps to make sense of this voice by digging deeper into its origin. A skillful coach can help to analyze what is actually true and what is a self-limiting belief.

How to speak to the inner demotivator?

By choosing different words or looking at situations in less dead-end ways, we can widen perspectives and take action without limiting ourselves with fear. For example, if we consider ourselves humble and curious, always learning, then mistakes along the way are great opportunities to become more knowledgeable. Reprimanding ourselves for past mistakes is not helpful or productive, but considering them keys to more understanding is. For example, we may say "I’ve always thought you do xxx this way, but I was wrong, apparently there’s a more efficient way these days that I need to learn.”

Many new challenges or difficulties stem from our fear of losing face. We may speak from past experiences and think that we’re unable to succeed because we failed before. What if we were open about our vulnerabilities and sought support from outside? People are surprisingly willing to help. When we repeat the language of failure, we may also risk it becoming a reality.

Moving from negative self-talk can be really empowering and has a tremendous impact on our wellbeing. The world can be full of opportunities and joy of discovery or it can be full of mistakes, shame and fear. We can choose the language we build our worlds with.